25 ・ Don't Jump Ahead Of YourseIf Everyone can dO SO much at a time; we are all able to think about many thmgs at once. Jumping ahead of what is happening at the moment happens because you can think about many things at the s ame time, ⅲ - cluding thinking about the future. Thinking t00 much about the future will not support what you are doing right now. "I am always thinking about tomorrow and when the day is over I feel unhappy because I haven't done much. I think it's because I think t00 much about tomorrow and not enough about what I am doing right no 、 V. Lon Be aware of the present moment; give it your best, rather than going t00 far forward. Be aware and enjoy the p resent moment. 34

40 ・ Touch Your Partner Often One of the things that babies and children value very much is the sense Of touch. Being touched is important to them and t0 their sense 0f well-being and safety. As you grow up, this wonderful part 0f your life—touch- ing, and being touched—may not happen as much. Somehow we get the ide a it' s not OK for grown-up people t0 touch so much. Touch your partner often. A gentle touch on the arm or a soft touch t0 the face is friendly; it talks t0 b0th 0f you about your love and helps your well-being. H01d hands. Sit close when watching TV or when you are both sitting reading together. You may not be aware of how much a gentle touch can help you build your love for each 0ther. Your heart will recognize this touch and it will add to building a loving relationship. 51

44 ・ Look For Things You Really Like About Each Other lt is easy to be hurt by small things that your partner does. Thinking t00 much about these things can make you very unhappy. If you are not careful, bad feelings about small things can come t0 be what you think about most Of the time. Don' t spend t00 much time thinking about all the small things that are bad about your partner. Balance this by thinking ab out what you re ally like and love about him. There will be much more that you like than you dislike. Right now, think about three things that he does that are kind or are nice for you. Learn t0 balance the small bad things with the good things he does. Learn to accept the small things because that is what they are … small things. 55

60. When You Think Too Much Sally is a woman wh0 worries t00 much. She said, "I really worry about small thlngs that happen. Sometimes these things have happened three days ago and I am still worrying about them. If my boyfriend does something that I don't like, I worry about it endlessly. ' Sally makes small thing into big things often. Some- thing small becomes something big because she has thought t00 much about it for three days. Do you think t00 much about the past and then that becomes a vvorry? Are YOLI an over-worrier? Some people think about something that happened yesterday and this turns tO worry about what they said or didn't say, or could have said tO their partner. The key is to let go of thoughts about the past and live in present time. Just remind yourself what you are dOing now. You may be sitting in a chair or in a train or at work or sitfing at home; wherever you are right now is important. Try tO bring yourself back tO what is happening at this moment. Thinking about the past and trying to change some- thing that has already passed is a very hard way t0 treat yourself. NO one can change the past. Let go 0f what you said or did yesterday and 100k at where and what you are doing right now.

39 ・ Do Nice Things For Your Partner Remember tO dO nice things for your partner. Something thoughtful or ple asant will be thought of very kindly by your partner and will help the relation- ship to be healthy and grow ・ When you do something pleasant you are showing that you love your partner and that you care SO much for them that you wish to please them ⅲ small or big ways. Mostly, a small gift or act will be enough; it does not need tO cost a 10t Of money. lt is the thought that is important, the thought that shows your love. Give your partner a small written note, or a card with a message Of love, a bOOk or a letter or some small thing that he likes. This will tell him how much you care for him. These are all small things that do not cost a 10t of money but which show how much you love him. DO nice things for your partner often. 50

Perfect Love? Love is a very special feeling. Much is talked about ro- mance as being perfect, but having that special feeling all the time is not possible. Someone else cannot make you feel special all 0f the time and you can't make someone else happy all of the time. Women will be disappointed if they search for the perfect" love, where everything is great and the other person is thinking and caring about you all the time. lt's easy tO lose your sense Of reality and come to hope too much for this kind of love, as your heart will be excited and your hopes will be high. If you can have good feelings about yourself when you are falling in love, if you can care about and love yourself, if you can accept that love isn't perfect all the time, then you will allow love to happen in a more natural and caring way. 8

95 ・ Connect With Yourself Take time to nurture yourself. Get ⅲ touch with your lnner self, your inner WiSdom. Being still is a great way to get in touch with the real you. When you stop thinking and just sit and let your mind drift, you create a space for your inner self to breathe, creating a rich inner life, a life that isn't about Other people and action, just about you and your inner true self. Each person has their own way Of connecting with this inner part of themselves. Try your own way to find some space and time to stop and let go of everyd ay life. "When I sit still and stop thinking, there is this other part of me who is just kind 研 happy and at ease with myself, just sitting doing nothing. This is my inner self. I feel better about myself when I make time to sit quietly and let go of my mind trying to make sense of everything all the time. When I make time to do that I am a much happier person and much less stressed. " Kylie 111

1. Allow For Love lt is natural t0 100k forward to being ⅲ love and to being loved. But if you expect love t00 much, if you hope t00 hard, you may change how you act day-to- day. If you do not act in your natural way, you may make it harder for love tO come tO you. You may send the wrong signs tO men about whO you are that make it harder for them to like you. Even though you might not realize it, everyone shows little signs to the other person about how they feel and what they think. Do not hope too much for friendship or romance, be yourself and allow love t0 find you. Keep the goal 0f a romance in your mind but d0 not spend a 10t 0f time thinking about it or changing your natural way 0f acting. Keep the door open for romance, but dO not lOOk at every man you meet and ask yourself if he is Mr. Right. Let friendship and romance happen naturally. 6

lntroduction Some people say that life is tough for women today. Women are expected to work, be perfect mothers, calmly juggle everything, balance their lives and both look and be sexy. Others say that it is an exciting time in history for women; SO many opportunities, SO much knowledge and information iS accessible. 、 V01 れ′ S VOices being heard and respected more than ever before. Globally, women are being appointed to leadership roles and government positions and there are 1 . ore women on Boards Of Directors than ever before. 、Ⅳ 01 れ en have 1 れ ore ChOices and opportunities educa- tion, 1 .ore career opportunities, 1 れ ore ChOices abOt1t partnership and motherhood. There iS an awakemng Of possibilities among Ⅵ , 01 れ en 冫 、 V01 れ en are finding new ways tO express themselves and create the lives they dream 0f. This is a time 0f hope as well as opportunity for personal fulfilment and success. ln writing this bOOk, we set out tO capture aspects of this time in history and offer guidance and assistance. We interviewed hundreds Of women about aspects Of their lives. S01 れ e 、 V01 れ en have achieved much in several areas Of their lives but have felt frustrated about how to find love and happiness. For example, 1

Time For Yourself DO you make time for yourself? Do you have times where you do things just for you? Our work culture has placed a high value on paid work. Everyone works longer hours at their everyday jObs SO it may not feel natural tO spend time for your- self by yourself. Some people make their relaxation time as busy as a work day. They fit ⅲ so much that they never seem tO stop dOing things, either at work or in their own time. Allow quiet time for yourself; it is very healthy to treat yourself in this way. 103